Why smart people do dumb stuff: How to find fulfillment and influence others

We are driven by forces that often seem beyond our control.

We prefer to believe we make rational decisions, but neuroscience has demonstrated that our decisions are actually emotional, but we seek logical reasons to justify them.

One of the most powerful concepts I have ever learned was the model of the six emotional needs. Every decision you have ever made has been driven by one or more of these six emotional needs.

This model completely changed how I view human behavior and decision making. Now I consider these six needs every time I negotiate, teach, coach, sell, or influence other people.

When you have a practical understanding of this model, your romantic, personal, and professional relationships will dramatically improve. Continue reading “Why smart people do dumb stuff: How to find fulfillment and influence others”

You are not alone

For many, the holidays can be a very lonely time.

Especially if you look at the highlight reels we post in social media.

It’s tempting to believe everyone else is living a perfect life when perhaps, you, or someone you know, might be struggling right now.

Here is a little secret that not everyone has the courage to admit.

EVERYONE is struggling with something.

Yes, even those “perfect” people you may admire, idolize, or envy.

The people you may be jealous of with the bigger house, nicer car, more money, prestigious title, thinner body, sexier partner, better behaved kids, and all the rest; every one of them is fighting a battle that you have no idea about.

If not today, they did yesterday, or they will tomorrow.

During my years as a police officer, and in my work as an author, coach, and teacher, I’ve had intimate conversations with thousands of people during their darkest hours. I’ve heard their greatest pains, fears, and frustrations.

What I’ve l discovered is that although not everyone shows it, everyone is struggling with the challenges that life throws at us.

For many, the holidays can be a very dark place, so if that is you today, my Christmas gift is to remind you that you are not alone.

There may be times that you feel like you are all fucked up, but that’s ok, because so are the rest of us.

If this message was not relevant for you today, I am grateful to hear that, but please remember to reach out to those that may not feel as fortunate.

No matter where you are, I wish you and your family a very merry Christmas.


P.S. To read inspiring stories of other people who’ve overcome adversity, check out “Motivation.” You can download it right now while the kids are playing with their new toys.

New Book Release

Most small-business marketing sucks, and if you are willing to be honest, you probably do not have a reliable marketing system that dependably delivers new and returning customers or clients.

Many business owners are floundering when it comes to advertising and marketing because they have never been exposed to the fundamentals of direct response marketing. Many small-business owners and solopreneurs struggle as they repeatedly make the same mistakes. Continue reading “New Book Release”

How to be Above Average

Most think they are above average.

For example, in one survey 94% of college professors claim they do above average work.

Statistically, it is impossible that 94% of any group is above average.

An educated group of college professors should understand the statistical impossibility that all of them are superior, but illusory superiority leads people to believe they are more capable than they really are.

Continue reading “How to be Above Average”

Your Unconscious Limitations

img_4211We are controlled by unconscious forces that prevent us from reaching our full potential.

Regardless how hard we try, it is difficult to understand ourselves because we have no direct access to our unconscious.

Our conscious thoughts are conceived from what we are unconscious of, but that does not stop us from creating a list of reasons for our feelings.

We should, however, be suspicious of these reasons because we fabricate a story about how we feel based on unreliable information.

The narrative we tell ourselves often includes a hint of truth, yet it frequently misrepresents how we actually feel. Continue reading “Your Unconscious Limitations”