Evandro Nunes – developing self-confidence, dealing with bullies, and finding inner peace

Evandro Nunes is a trainer at the world-famous Gracie Jiu-Jitsu University and has earned several world championship Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu medals.

His mindset toward fighting began forming while being raised by a tough Brazilian father who instilled strong, traditional values in him.

“If you see injustice toward you, or someone else, you stand up for it,” Evandro’s father taught him. “If you’re wrong, you apologize, but if you’re right, you fight for it.”

Evandro was born with a firm sense of right and wrong, but it was his father’s lessons that reinforced those instincts.

“It only made sense. If I’m right, I should win,” Evandro said. “The good guy wins and the bad guy loses, just like in the movies.”

That instinct led him into a lot of fights as a kid, many of which were with his brother, who was four years older.

“My brother and I fought a lot,” Evandro said, “but I still remember the first time I won.”

In this fight, Evandro was only seven years old and thought he could not possibly defeat his much-larger sibling.

“He punched me in the shoulder, and I fell on the floor crying,” Evandro said.

Evandro’s brother pushed him down four more times and then demanded that he stay on the ground.

“I remember feeling that I was right, so I should not lose,” Evandro said. “I was willing to go as far as it took to defend my ground.” Continue reading “Evandro Nunes – developing self-confidence, dealing with bullies, and finding inner peace”

Why smart people do dumb stuff: How to find fulfillment and influence others

We are driven by forces that often seem beyond our control.

We prefer to believe we make rational decisions, but neuroscience has demonstrated that our decisions are actually emotional, but we seek logical reasons to justify them.

One of the most powerful concepts I have ever learned was the model of the six emotional needs. Every decision you have ever made has been driven by one or more of these six emotional needs.

This model completely changed how I view human behavior and decision making. Now I consider these six needs every time I negotiate, teach, coach, sell, or influence other people.

When you have a practical understanding of this model, your romantic, personal, and professional relationships will dramatically improve. Continue reading “Why smart people do dumb stuff: How to find fulfillment and influence others”

You are not alone

For many, the holidays can be a very lonely time.

Especially if you look at the highlight reels we post in social media.

It’s tempting to believe everyone else is living a perfect life when perhaps, you, or someone you know, might be struggling right now.

Here is a little secret that not everyone has the courage to admit.

EVERYONE is struggling with something.

Yes, even those “perfect” people you may admire, idolize, or envy.

The people you may be jealous of with the bigger house, nicer car, more money, prestigious title, thinner body, sexier partner, better behaved kids, and all the rest; every one of them is fighting a battle that you have no idea about.

If not today, they did yesterday, or they will tomorrow.

During my years as a police officer, and in my work as an author, coach, and teacher, I’ve had intimate conversations with thousands of people during their darkest hours. I’ve heard their greatest pains, fears, and frustrations.

What I’ve l discovered is that although not everyone shows it, everyone is struggling with the challenges that life throws at us.

For many, the holidays can be a very dark place, so if that is you today, my Christmas gift is to remind you that you are not alone.

There may be times that you feel like you are all fucked up, but that’s ok, because so are the rest of us.

If this message was not relevant for you today, I am grateful to hear that, but please remember to reach out to those that may not feel as fortunate.

No matter where you are, I wish you and your family a very merry Christmas.

Chuck

P.S. To read inspiring stories of other people who’ve overcome adversity, check out “Motivation.” You can download it right now while the kids are playing with their new toys.

Jerome Roseborough – Growth through Adversity

Jerome Roseborough is an active Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu competitor and the owner of Katy Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Revolution Team Academy in Texas.

Jerome found Jiu-Jitsu when a friend invited him to train in a small room in an apartment complex.

“It was not even a class,” Jerome said. “We did not have mats, so we just rolled on the carpet. We ended up smashing out a window, and I had rug burns all over my elbows. I loved it.”

They trained together for a few months and eventually bought some mats and invited other friends. After training there for about a year, Jerome moved to Texas and immediately joined Katy BJJ as a white belt.

“Before that first day, I didn’t realize there was Jiu-Jitsu in a gi,” Jerome said. “Probably like everybody else who walks in, I wasn’t grasping the concept of how the gi was working against me.”

Jerome was amazed that smaller and weaker guys were crushing him.

“I’ve noticed there are two types of people who try Jiu-Jitsu,” Jerome explained. “One person’s ego is so fragile that they will never come back, but the other comes back determined to learn it.”

Jerome has never had an inflated ego. In fact, he felt he was on the other end of the spectrum as the weaker or insecure person, so discovering Jiu-Jitsu gave him hope.

His attitude toward growth in life and Jiu-Jitsu developed during a tumultuous journey that began when he was homeless and living in a car as a child.

Jerome’s father wasn’t around when he was born, and his mother raised five kids alone by working in a department store. Jerome’s mother was fired after she was injured at work, and she was denied workers’ compensation payments. When the money dried up, they were evicted from their home and the family was split up. Jerome’s sisters were sent to a foster home, and his mother and second-oldest brother moved into a friend’s house.

“Everything was going all right,” Jerome said, “but then it all seemed to fall apart when she got hurt at work.” Continue reading “Jerome Roseborough – Growth through Adversity”

I Waited Too Long to Kill Him: How Indecision Can Be Fatal

how to make a decision

The dreams are less frequent with time, but they still haunt me.

This dream is real and the stakes were high.

Perhaps our dreams are a message—our subconscious trying slap us in the face.

This one is about indecision.

I probably should have died.

Those are the stakes when you start to pull the trigger.

This stuff makes me uncomfortable to talk about. 

In fact, I’m not sure if you can handle it because most pretend this doesn’t happen. But it does and it requires a different perspective on life.

Let me tell you the story. Continue reading “I Waited Too Long to Kill Him: How Indecision Can Be Fatal”